Monday, June 17, 2013

You Do Not Have a Gluten Allergy

I understand that you often feel like crap, and that while being human often means feeling like crap, a sense of entitlement leaves you convinced that you deserve better.

And I understand that a certain segment of the population has always badgered doctors into coming up with a label to pin on their crap-feeling...and that "nervous exhaustion", "Chronic Fatigue Syndrome", "Epstein Barr", and the rest of that long line of pseudo syndromes (which only seem to afflict narcissists) are, at this point, hideously unstylish.

And I also understand that any placebo's as good as another in addressing feelings of indeterminate malaise, and that placebos aren't fake - they truly do make a difference (including negative placebos of renunciation).

Finally, I realize that naming the source of your malaise feels so empowering that you fail to register how crappy you actually mostly still feel, just 'cuz you're doing something about it.

But let's get something straight: unless you're one of the 0.02% of the population with Coeliac disease, you do not have a gluten problem. So eat your breadsticks and just shut the hell up, ok?

Thank you.

PS - if you're certain it's a legitimate medical problem rather than purely psychological, then why are you furious at me? Even climate change deniers don't receive half the rage directed at gluten allergy deniers. Anti-Darwinists are rarely screamed at, so why would my smug ignorance particularly infuriate you unless your gluten fixation was about way more than just your digestive particulars?


bobjbkln said...

Moreover, for those of us of a certain age (or who have, heart, cholesterol, or intestinal problems) gluten-free foods are a definite downer because they contain little or no dietary fiber which IS essential to health.

DValve said...

"Gluten free" foods mostly suck, nutritionally and otherwise, but the longer you look, the more exceptions you'll find. But who said that being gluten free is about having a gluten allergy? My wife will get sick for days if a waiter accidentally puts a a crouton on her salad and then removes it, but I make no pretense of the fact that I have no gluten allergy. I avoid it to optimize my health. Inflammation is at the heart of most chronic and deadly disease, and the top foods that encourage inflammation are gluten, dairy, alcohol and sugar. Most people don't need to be as scrupulous as I do, but then again, most people didn't have malignant cancer that doesn't respond to chemo. I have no doubt that I remain cancer free in large part because of my optimized diet. Nevertheless, I see people with inflammatory diseases from arthritis to sarcoidosis, and I have to bite my tongue, because i know that no one wants to hear about how much better they'll feel off gluten. I'm just sorry that the current gluten fad has maligned the true value of going gluten free for the people who could really benefit from it.

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