Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Empowerment Postscript #3

Even though I completely misunderstood my friend's email about Mormons, I was glad to be reminded to tie that group into my theory of anti-empowerment. The Mormons put the most affable, most American face on what otherwise would surely have been universally viewed as a weird, dangerous cult. Again, minorities campaigning for equal treatment often make the mistake of leading with their differences, when precisely the opposite tack is most effective.

Of course, my friend wasn't talking about Mormonism in general, but specifically about polygamy. He writes:
"That discussion was in the context of marriage equality. Polygamy has definitely not been accepted, even for most boring dudes."
True, of course. And a lot could be said about that (e.g. unlike other minorities, polygamists will never garner support from the left, which views the practice as misogynist). In the end, though, there are extremes of extremes which can never be mainstreamed. This observation comfortably fits my argument that minorities are most easily accepted into plurality when they lead with their dull integrability rather than their proud dissimilarities.

One angry-seeming black power salute from Obama and he'd never have come close to the senate, much less the presidency. Remember how that innocent fist bump rocked the nation?



The same applies to the lack of conspicuous nipple clamps adorning the gentlemen making the case for marriage equality. The path to mainstream inclusion often involves some shaving off of the most extreme differences - which is why the staunchest group members often viscerally reject a course of pluralization.

Mormons, who've cannily presented themselves with signature sunny affability, rather than flaunting their strange underwear and creation dogma, have largely been accepted. We welcome the integrable and hesitatingly accept some weirdness, but polygamy's beyond the pale. As early and highly-skilled pioneers in the strategy I'm advocating, church leaders disavowed that practice when reality sunk in. Some radical practitioners persist with group marriage, and, as a result, their communities are isolated and persecuted by the mainstream.

Mormons were compelled to disavow polygamy. And Obama, by the same token, was compelled to stay well to the right of mainstream America on, for example, marijuana penalties. Such moves maintain the plurality. Plurality, like all compromise, is tepid and dull.

Speaking of extreme behavior, I find it interesting that the transgendered are often included in discussion of gay equality. To a conservative, that seems like yet another sneaky liberal encroachment. While a majority of Americans may be more or less favorable to normalizing homosexuality (in terms of choices framed by society as being freely available to children, etc.), normalisation of transgenderism seems, at least for now, to be pushing it. I don't think America's ready to culturally enshrine this lifestyle choice; to have one's child taught that when he grows up he might find himself in love with a girl or a boy or that he might choose to chop off his penis.

The question of whether transgendered people deserve equal rights is moot. Everybody deserves equal rights, period. But as to whether the practice should be presented as just another reasonable lifestyle choice, that's going to be a tough sell, ala polygamy. They'll likely have to let that one go.

(Though, who knows; twenty years from now I may look back at myself as having been ignorantly, disgustingly backward on the issue. There's absolutely no way to know at this point. As I once noted, a sanctimonious amnesia blocks people from acknowledging their own view of gay rights from just a couple decades ago, leaving them strangely unable to sympathize with those who haven't yet caught up.)

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Empowerment Postscript #2

I concluded my previous posting (a postscript to this) by saying:
"The message was delivered by boring, well-dressed, reasonable people, not dudes defiantly flaunting their nipple clamps"
...and a friend emailed in this comment:
That hasn't worked too well for the Mormons, has it? And how more boring could one get?
I think absolutely the contrary is true. There have been societies that were relatively tolerant of new religious movements and cults, but America sure isn't one of them. The reason Mormonism has flourished and been viewed with uncharacteristic (if not total) tolerance here is precisely the image of boring, well-dressed, reasonable affability on the part of its practitioners - almost a caricature of the world's image of Americans.

So Mormonism is a perfect example of what I'm describing. Rather than staunchly leading with what makes them different ("Empowerment!"), they lead with what makes them a comfortably dull fit amid the plurality.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Empowerment Postscript #1

This is a postscript to my previous posting, "A Case Against Empowerment".

As I noted in a comment beneath that article:
"The reason gay rights have transformed with such miraculous speed is that this is exactly the tack they took. "We just want to love who we love, like any American." Not "a gay thing", just an American thing. The message was delivered by boring, well-dressed, reasonable people, not dudes defiantly flaunting their nipple clamps (which would have absolutely nothing to do with it anyway). Dull pluralism. That's the right tack, and we've just seen how very well it works."

Thursday, February 13, 2014

A Case Against Empowerment

Prior to Obama, black presidential candidates were running for black presidencies. Melanin-forward!

Obama was a presidential candidate who happened to be black. And one could almost hear the foundational national "duh" as it became instantly obvious that that was the only smart approach. A fog had lifted, and I'd imagine it was excruciatingly embarrassing for Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton to suddenly realize how wrongly they'd been going about it.

The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. And the opposite of being a discriminated-against minority isn't becoming an empowered minority, it's pluralism. Boring old pluralism.

The old model was "empowerment". That notion rings nobly in the ears of many Americans, but it plays to the dualism which gives birth to discrimination in the first place. That dualism needs to be transcended, not stoked. This is a profound lesson America learned in 2008, but I'm not sure it was fully digested.

Obama didn't offer, and hasn't run, a black presidency. Love him or hate him, he's about way more than melanin. Why on earth would I want a female presidency, or a Jewish presidency? Administrations aren't like novelty flavors of KitKat bars. I don't want some glorious rainbow, I want smart governance. I'll vote for a good president, period!

This lesson covers more than politics. The antidote to discrimination is (dull) pluralism, not (sexy) empowerment. Fight the duality, don't feed it! Down with empowerment!

(Note that I'm talking about today, not 1850 or 1950. Countless heroes absolutely needed to stand up solidly for rights when they had none. But in present day society - characterized by lingering and insidious discrimination rather than the more explicit and brazen sort - a tactical shift needed to happen, and Obama exemplified that shift. Lead with your quality, not your melanin...or gender, or ethnicity, or whatever issue you're worried people might be hung up about.)


Update:

See also postscript #1, postscript #2, and postscript #3.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Bell's Beer

I've been waiting for Bell's Brewery (from Kalamzoo, MI) to send their beers to NYC for twenty five years. Tonight, they arrived. Their lineup can be a bit inconsistent, but if you stick to the hits (e.g. Two Hearted Ale, Expedition Stout, Amber Ale, and a new power lager, Quinannan Falls, which is stupendous), you'll enjoy some deftly balanced, three dimensional brews, often with a focused flavor core from which secondary flavors amply cascade.

I took this shot at Williamsburg's Barcade which, to my surprise, turned out to do a decent job of epitomizing 21st century Brooklyn:



Monday, February 10, 2014

Star Blanded Banner

I can live with poisoned dogs, evicted homeowners, and $55B diverted to Putin's cronies to produce these Olympics. But I can never forgive the insanely poor treatment of the Star Spangled Banner played back at podium ceremonies.

Granted, it's not the greatest tune in the world (my favorite anthem, fwiw, is the one from Vietnam), but there are some harmonic subtleties which can be handled any number of interesting ways. And the Russians' version deliberately paves over every one of those junctures, resulting in utter pablum. The melody's intact, so it gets the job done, but we musicians can easily discern the arranger's smug smirk.

I don't have much sense of patriotism to offend, but this has sure insulted the bejesus out of my musical sensibilities...

Friday, January 31, 2014

The Year the Internet Stopped Being a Computer

This has already turned into a watershed year for me. After 20 years of online activity, and 15 years of using Google (I was an early advocate), I've switched to always using natural language searches.

"Natural language" is just a fancy way of saying "normal human speech". As an early Internet adapter, I've been in the habit of using computer-speak with computers, rather than phrasing things conversationally and expecting them to understand. So if I were trying to find listings for 2008 Camrys, I'd have framed my query like this:

allintext:camry toyota 2008 "used car" price -review

...asking Google to find me pages containing (in their actual visible text) "camry", toyota", "2008", the phrase "used car", excluding pages containing the word "review".

These days, I simply search for 2008 toyota camry used car prices, and I actually get better results than when I try to finesse it. The tipping point has been reached.

The glib upshot might be that Google's computer is now better at understanding my human-speak than I am at speaking computer-speak. But the truth is a bit more subtle. There are three main factors at play:

1. At the Internet's current scale, there's no choice but to accommodate natural language search.
Google used to be geared toward nerds, but now it serves the world, so it's been forced to accommodate - even favor - natural language. What's more, they've neglected their old nerd tools along the way, so there are fewer and fewer ways to force searches to adhere to your parameters. It feels like a frustrating lack of power, but I've come to accept that we don't really need those tools anymore. More often than not, Google simply knows (it's a real - though little-discussed - example of artificial intelligence).

2. Web sites have prioritized discovery via natural language search queries.
This is a bad thing when shmucky webmasters scheme to lure visitors to their unhelpful spammy sites. But Google is doing a better and better job of weeding those out. So the process is working as it should: the page built at the dawn of the internet by cool Indonesian guys which calculates crow-fly distances between any two world locations can be found simply by simply searching the phrase "how far is it". As well it should!

3. Google triggers a plethora of web apps from natural language searches
Search for 124 x 236 = and you'll be shown a calculater with your calculation pre-keyed in and the result shown in bold. Search for 25 euros in US dollars and you'll be shown currency converter app. Search for AAPL stock and you get Apple's stock chart. Etc., etc., ad infinitum. You used to need to type special terms to trigger these apps. But, per #1, the nerds lost and the masses won, and we no longer need to manually trigger them.


Yesterday capped it. I needed to know how many days had passed since last September 22nd. So I searched, like a frickin' idiot, for this: how many days since 9/22/13?

And I got my answer in the very first hit.

There's no going back.


Also, it's now officially ridiculous that Internet news is categorized as "High Tech" or "Science" news. The Internet has as much to do with tech at this point as the TV industry does.

Oldies, Hopefully Goodies

A couple of my old reviews just went up on Chowhound: my Peter Luger review from 2003, and my original DiFara Pizza review from 1998.

You can find a bunch more of my old writings here.

Not many people paid much attention to the super-ambitious ten week Chow Tour my corporate overlords at CNET forced me to take (Clay's memorable line was "I'm not asking you to do this, I'm telling you to do this"), but I believe I extracted some real good lemonade. Coverage starts here (and you can navigate using the sidebar). Some of the more popular stand-alone entries included:

Biltmore Blueblood Blues (Plus Barbecue) (suffering in splendor at the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC)
The Greatest (Chowhounding) Story Ever Told (miracle tales in rural Kentucky)
36 Sublime Hours in Newfoundland (Newfoundland is like heaven)
Madly in Love With Maxine's (the scary black sheep of the Bardstown, Kentucky restaurant scene turns out to be the only place with real heart)
The Enchanted Misty Mountain of Tea and Excrement(drinking rare tea and eating strange food with the legendary David Hoffman in NoCal)
Chow Tour Redux...or: Lots and Lots of Millet (thinking back on What It All Meant)
and...
...and Vacation Tamales (incredible tamales in Puerto Vallarta)

Finally, I got good response from my "Chowhounding St. Louis" article posted here to the slog last year.

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Sur La Table Burnished Bamboo Stir-Fry Spatula, 12"

A bit random, I know, but this $4 bamboo spatula from Sur La Table was one of the best purchases I made last year.

People overuse wooden spoons. Same for full spatulas. Both are specialized tools with little versatility, yet many people struggle to use them in wide-ranging cooking tasks for which they're not appropriate.

But Sur La Table's Bamboo Stir-Fry Spatula is a champ of versatility, fantastic for stir fries, scrambled eggs, omelets, leftovers, and anything requiring a quick stir or flip. It won't scratch non-stick surfaces, but poses none of the melting risk of the plastic implements designed for that usage. And it cleans up much more easily than wood; nothing ever sticks to it. A quick wipe and you're good.

The only jobs this item fails at are those specifically tailored to wooden spoons (heavy-duty ingredient mixing) or full spatulas (pancake flipping). I use it several times per day, along with my tongs, and rarely find myself going to my implements drawer anymore.

Sur La Table makes a 15" version, but I like the 12" one.

Friday, January 24, 2014

Tate's Bake Shop's Butterscotch Pecan Cookies

Earlier this year, I described a sublime experience of cookie transcendence:
Speaking of cookies, best I currently know are at sherry b dessert studio (65 King Street, Chappaqua, NY; 914-238-8300). It's painfully pretentious, and it's agonizingly expensive (both of which are telegraphed by the name's lower case), but if you can sell some old gear on eBay or take out a second mortgage on your house to cobble together sufficient cash to afford a cookie, you'll find it's actually worth it.
The cookies have a lot going for them. Ingredients are perfectly harmonious, salt is at the inward edge of subliminal, they're texturally complex (crisp outer, chewy inner) and the flavor is as long and full and subtly-layered as a great wine. Plus, they have a quality that no other food writer ever seems to mention: oven flavor.

"Oven flavor", for me, is the distinctive flavor that comes from being baked in a home oven - much as the Chinese describe "wok breath" as the slightly smokey metallic flavor hint of well-sauteed noodles and such. You don't usually find oven flavor in commercial baked goods. It's the flavor that makes you think "home-made", and it is apparently hard to fake. With some items, you can do without it, but, for me, if it's not present in cookies, they'll inevitably taste soulless.

The whole idea of oven flavor angered some highly-respected professional bakers on Chowhound way back in the day. They didn't really understand what I was talking about, but took umbrage at the notion there might be anything missing or inadequate about their work.

The best theory offered was that I was describing flavor imparted by dirty home ovens, courtesy of the light smoke coming off the grease and other shmutz. And this sounds awfully disgusting (which was certainly the spirit in which the proposal was offered), until you realize that grease/shmutz smoke has, until very recently, been a fundamental part of human cuisine. We, as individuals and as a species, were raised on that!

Maybe that's it, but the cookies at sherry b dessert studio, with perfect elegant touch, refined ingredients and overall genteel wondrousness, have oven flavor. Lots of it. And there's no fricking way their tony, expensive ovens are anything but immaculate.

So: stick it, pro bakers! Oven flavor is a thing, and it's achievable with professional equipment!

But here's some news. I just found packaged, widely-available cookies that are very similar. They're nearly as refined, and, best of all, they're just rife with oven flavor!

I've known about Tate's Bake Shop cookies for some time. They make crispy, expensive supermarket cookies which never seem to come together into a delicious gestalt. For example, the chocolate in the chocolate chip cookies is fine quality, but ill-chosen (not enough depth). The butter flavor screams out at you, as if to justify the expense. They're a tad over-salted, and while I like crisp cookies, these are nearly hard/brittle. They're decent cookies, but a bit fussy and superficial.

But I just tried their butterscotch pecan cookies for the first time, and they kill. With these, the aggressive butteryness works. The extreme crispness works. Even the salt works. It all works. And there's even oven flavor! At $6 for a prissily-wrapped bag of eleven cookies, it seems like a regal purchase at my supermaret, but given that the cookies at sherry b dessert studio cost $6 each, it's actually a deal. These are the best widely-available cookies I've ever found in this country.



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